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Why a dad gives his 10-year-old marijuana

Another advantage of siblings |

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belinda-luscombe
Hello former children who now have children,

This week in the dead tree edition of TIME, I interviewed Mona Hanna Attisha , the pediatrician who proved that when Flint, Michigan, switched to using water from the local river to save money, the result was an increase in lead in the local children's blood levels. She pointed out that the lead was just another thing that parents in Flint had to worry about. "Our children already had so many obstacles to their development," she told me. "We have an almost 60% poverty rate for our kids, six zero. No full service grocery stores. One of the most violent crime rates in this city, crumbling schools, depopulation, racism." It's a sobering reminder of how much compassion children need, and not just our own children. As parents, we know what it's like to worry about kids' welfare. Let's have compassion on other parents too, whether or not we always approve of their choices.

If you have any ideas you want to share, I'm still at belinda.luscombe@time.com or @luscombeland on Twitter.

P.S. If you like this newsletter, please pass it on to a friend. And if you got it from a friend, sign up here for email delivery each Friday. You know, more or less.
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Why would any parent give their 10 year old marijuana? Because it may be the best treatment available for some rare forms of epilepsy and seizure disorders. Here's one father's story about why he enrolled his daughter in a trial for a recently FDA-approved form of marijuana. "We were doing what desperate parents do," he writes. "You go out there and read everything and hopefully make your own educated guesses."  TIME

If you're up for a weep, this beautiful, heart-fracturing story from the mother of a young man who committed suicide should provide the impetus. But it will also remind you of the really wonderful parts of raising a child, including the weird joy you feel when they can do something you can't and when they just love doing it.  The Cut

Just in case you're in the parts of the world that get hit by heatwaves like the one in the the U.S.A. this weekend, here's how to stay safe during a heatwave. TIME

As I might have mentioned every now and then, I'm writing a book on marriage. Research suggests that children accrue many advantages from having two parents who love each other (which doesn't mean that children of single parents will necessarily be damaged.) One of the most difficult times in a marriage, however, is right after the arrival of that baby. That is, the being who will benefit most from the marriage can put the marriage in jeopardy. So here are some tips on how to get through that tricky part—and some of the tricky parts that come later. Gottman Institute

If however, parents continue to fight, all is not lost. A new study says that for those children whose parents do have destructive conflicts, a strong sibling bond is a helpful buffer. "We showed that having a good relationship with a brother or sister reduced heightened vulnerability for youth exposed to conflicts between their parents by decreasing their tendencies to experience distress in response to later disagreements between their parents," the authors wrote. The study defines a good sibling relationship as one full of warmth, closeness, and problem solving, and with only low levels of antagonism, conflict, and detachment. University of Rochester

This story is four years old, which is like a century in news years, and refers to a long ago forgotten incident, in which a mom left her daughter at the park for too long, because she had to work. But as summer rolls around again, I think it's useful to remember that not every parents greets it with a sigh of relief. Here's wishing you good luck with your summer plans. It's not too late to plan some fun. TIME

PFFT: Parenting from Famous Types

Tom Hardy, actor and father of two,

"If anyone else [deprived you of this much sleep], you'd have them up at the Hague for war crimes."

 
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